The past cannot be altered
by Aleria14
Summary: When something truly terrible happens and Max blames herself, Fang comforts her and shows her that it isn't her fault by using his new skill. But what has happened? And what is Fang's new skill? Fax. A story about how you should move on in tough times


**Me: Well, I wrote this a while ago...okay, like three months ago and I dug it up. It was one of those fanfics that wasn't suposed to see fanfiction....heh...**

**Iggy: And I can see why**

**Me: Iggy, how many times do I have to tell you this? You. Can't. See. Anything.**

**Iggy: -facepalm-**

**Me: So yeah, it's slightly depressing and stuff, but for my standard it's well written and I enjoyed writing it, so whatever :P**

**Iggy: Personally I hate it**

**Me: -eyeroll-**

**_LOOK OVER THERE! IT'S A DISCLAIMER! I don't own Maximum Ride...at all. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Bleh. But I do own Iggy-_**

**Iggy: No you don't!**

**Me: Fine, I don't. Okay, on with the story. Sorry about any mistakes you may pick up...**

_Have you ever heard that saying 'You don't know what you have until it's gone'? Well, you hear people blabbering on about it on TV and you read it in books…in fact, it appears everywhere. I'm sure that everyone has heard it at some point. But I know that not everyone has experienced it._

_I'm Max. Although, I'm sure that you know that so there's no point in explaining myself, right? Anyway, the Flock and I are currently at…well…_

I sighed, putting my pen down on my bed and looking out the window. I guess that, for once, my mom was wrong and there really was no need to keep a journal. It wasn't making me feel better to put my thoughts down onto paper; it was making me feel worse.

I stared at the words that I had neatly printed across the blue lines of the notebook, reading them over and over again and wishing them not to be true. I blinked as a round, wet mark appeared on the page, followed by another and another. Before I knew it I was sobbing, finally releasing what I had been holding back in front of the Flock. Seeing me break down wasn't going to help them. I needed to be strong, I needed to be the invincible Maximum Ride.

_But you know that you aren't invincible. This incident has proved that. _

No, this wasn't the voice. It was my _own _voice at the back of my mind, the one that was seeking the truth, making me feel worse.

_And this incident as also proved that this is all my fault. EVERYTHING is my fault._

A knock at my door made my crying cease abruptly.

"Go away," I said, making sure that my voice didn't falter.

But, of course, Fang came in anyway.

"What do you want?" I asked rudely, brushing the hair off my face and wiping my eyes.

Fang looked at me, his expression softening as he slowly lowered himself down next to me, not breaking eye contact. But something was…off about his gaze. Something that I had only seen once, maybe twice in my life.

Fang had been crying.

And that's when I cracked again. The air left my lungs with a 'whoosh' and I was sobbing into Fang's chest, leaving a huge wet mark on his shirt.

He wrapped his muscled arms around my shaking shoulders and held me, letting me grieve in his cacoon of darkness.

"It's not your fault," he whispered, placing his chin on my head softly, holding me tighter. "None of this is your fault. Sometimes these things happen and we can't do anything to control them."

"That's a lie," I murmured, my sobs stopping but my anger rising. "How can you say that? If I had been there…if I hadn't dismissed the idea…"

"You don't know that. No matter what we did, no matter how hard we tried, the outcome would have been the same."

I shook my head against his chest and he gently pushed me back so we were looking at each other.

"Do you still remember that day about eight years ago…before we had the whole Flock?" He suddenly asked and I racked my brain.

"Fang, I don't know what you're-" and, suddenly, I could see it. Floating in front of Fang and I was this flat disk, blurred around the edges with amazing colors in the middle, mixed together.

"What is that?" I asked in wonder, reaching out to touch it. My fingers harmlessly seeped through it as if it was a dark, mist floating in a concentrated area.

"I can project memories."

My head whipped around in shock until I was staring at Fang again, face emotionless as usual.

"W-what?" I asked, sniffing a bit and wiping my red face again.

"I found out yesterday. It's kind of like showing the past…I guess…"

"And this is a new skill?" I asked, surprised that we were still gaining new abilities even after something this horrible had happened.

Fang shrugged. "I want to show you something."

I nodded briefly, turning my attention back to the foggy disk in front of me. Slowly, the colours began to take form and they were no longer swirling colours anymore, but they were an image – a moving image. And, although it was a bit blurry in some places I could make out three cages in a huge white room surrounded by…other grey blurs?

"Sorry," Fang said sheepishly. "I still have a few kinks to work out."

"No," I said, shaking my head. "This is amazing."

The image then began to zoom in closer and closer until we could see inside the cages. The cage on the left contained a small, dark haired boy with black wings…

"It's us!" I exclaimed in wonder. "But we're…"

"We're seven," Fang interrupted. "It's the past."

So, the cage on the left contained Mini-Fang, the cage in the middle contained a Mini-Me and the cage on the left contained a Mini-Iggy with…

"Oh, no," I said, removing my eyes from the screen to look at Fang who seemed to be concentrating really hard on the picture. "Please no, Fang," I whispered, but he shook his head and pointed towards to disk again.

Iggy had gauze wrapped around his head. I really didn't want to relive this moment again, I could remember it well enough the first time. This had been one of the worst days of our lives, but also the happiest. Worst, because Iggy had lost his eyesight forever, and the best because…

"Are you okay?" Mini-me asked, her voice shaking slightly as she pressed her face against the bars of the cage so she could see him better.

"I-I don't know," he whispered, his hands continuously running over the tightly wrapped bandages over his face. Although we couldn't see his eyes, we could tell that he was in a lot of pain and afraid.

"What did they do to you?" Mini-Fang asked, also curious as to what they had done to their friend.

"T-they said s-something about m-making my eyesight b-better," Mini-Iggy stuttered, his hands reaching out until they came to contact with the bars. He moved forward and pressed himself against the cold metal for support, his small wings drooping behind him like sad, dead plants. I held back a sob as I looked at him. He had been younger than Gazzy in this memory.

"Do you think it worked?" Mini-Me whispered, her eyes shifting to Mini-Fang who gave her a look that, for once, I couldn't read.

I turned and sat down on the bed, Fang taking his hand in mine.

"Of course it worked," Mini-Iggy said with more confidence than before. "I just don't like not being able to see."

He started tugging at the bandages again in annoyance, but Mini-Me stopped him, putting her scrawny arms through the bars and yanking his hands away.

"They're obviously on there for a reason, so just wait a while."

Mini-Iggy pouted and I couldn't help but smile. We were three sad kids living in hell, but we had each other.

At that moment, there was a loud wheeling noise that echoed around the room, and the younger versions of us whipped their heads to the side, probably awaiting the next form of torture that was to be brought upon them. But nothing bad happened. Instead, another cage was wheeled into the room and put next to us to form a square, and Mini-Me's cage door was thrown open. A Whitecoat then handed the young girl a baby with soft, blonde hair scattered all over the place in wisps like small feathers.

The girl looked down at the baby lovingly and rocked it gently in her arms, never questioning what she was supposed to do or why she had been handed the child.

I smiled at the memory that I was seeing. Little baby Gazzy and three year old Nudge had entered the room.

As soon as the Whitecoats walked out, Mini-me looked at Mini-Fang for guidance but he simply shrugged and stared between the baby and the toddler.

"Hello," Mini-me said cheerfully to Mini-Nudge, repositioning Mini-Gazzy in her arms to wave at her.

Mini-Nudge looked uncertain at first, but upon seeing the friendly smile on Mini-Me's face, she grinned and waved back.

"Okay, that's it," Mini-Iggy said irritably as he started tearing the bandages off his face. I willed my younger self to stop him from doing something that he'd regret, but the past could not be altered…no matter how much we wanted it to change.

Fang shifted next to me until our bodies were pressed together, his hand tightening its grip on mine. What he was trying to tell me was obvious; although he wanted to watch, he didn't like it either.

There was silence until Mini-Iggy ripped the final bandage on his face and opened his bloodshot, unseeing eyes. Everything above his nose was a mess. His fair hair was streaked with blood and so was his forehead, his pupils were mere pinpricks on his irises, not even attempting to take in light and his eyes were still leaking blood. I sucked in a breath and waited for the obvious question that was going to come next; 'why is it so dark in here?'

"Why is it so dark in here?" Mini-Iggy asked right on cue.

Mini-Me and Mini-Fang said nothing. Mini-Nudge had backed into a corner of her cage, obviously frightened by what she was seeing.

"Come on, guys," Mini-Iggy continued. "I mean, I've been complaining about not being able to see with the bandages on and you can't even see anything anyway."

Once again, no one said anything. I saw Mini-Fang give my younger self a worried look and she returned it, a tear sliding down her cheek when realisation finally dawned on her. I remembered that it took every ounce of my strength to not burst out sobbing back then. It was a lot to take in for a seven year old.

"The lights are on. We can still see everything," she whispered, her voice breaking as she gently rested the sleeping baby in the back of her cage so she could move closer to Mini-Iggy.

His face scrunched up in confusion before he rubbed his red eyes with his hands, only succeeding in leaving red streaks across his knuckles.

He removed his hands and blinked a few times, his body beginning to shake violently. He then rubbed his eyes more, now only causing himself pain as he hunched over in his cage, not sure what to do. Then, he burst into loud, painful sobs that echoed throughout the room.

I dropped my head onto Fang's shoulder, hiding my eyes from view and no longer able to stand the scene in front of me, but Fang turned my head back to the floating mist.

Mini-Me then did something that I didn't see coming. She pressed her body hard against the cage bars, and then put both her skinny arms through. She grabbed onto Mini-Iggy's cage with her small hands, and dragged it across the floor, not stopping until the bars crashed loudly together. Mini-Iggy took no notice though, and continued to sob uncontrollably into his hands, his body hunched over in a ball.

Mini-Me slowly reached through the bars of the cage and placed her arm across his back while he cried.

"You don't have to speak now," she said soothingly, her arm moving slowly up and down his back comfortingly. "But I want you to listen.

"I know that you think that it's all over and there's nothing more that you can do, but you're wrong. I say that you're wrong because if you believe that, then you're letting them win and that's even worse than what they did to you."

I looked over at Fang in bewilderment, but he was focussing intently on the mist – no, focussing on my _words_ like he was in a trance.

"And we can't go down without a fight either, 'cause then they'd see us as weak. And I know that you're not weak."

His sobbing slowly subsided as he listened to her words.

"If you can't see anymore, then so be it. We'll help you. We'll be your eyes, because we're a family. And families look out for each other."

Silent tears rolled down my cheeks, and Fang put a tender arm around my shoulders, sensing my sorrow.

Mini-Iggy's face slowly rose from his hands and he turned his head to face my younger self, his eyes looking even worse now that he'd been crying.

"Y-you promise?" He asked weakly, reaching blindly through the bars towards my younger self.

I took his hand in my own. "I promise. We'll always be there for you."

And that's when I lost it. I doubled over in my lap, sobbing my heart out. I had broken that promise, and now there was no help to give.

Fang drew me in closer, his expression dark. "Shh," he said quietly into my hair, rocking slightly in an attempt to calm me. "You did everything you could."

"B-but I couldn't s-save h-him," I choked out in between my sobs, finding it harder to breathe.

"No," he answered slowly. "But I know that he doesn't blame you. No one does except you. You expect so much of yourself, Max. But you can't do everything, and you're just going to have to except that. Just like I know Iggy already has. Please, he wouldn't want you to do this to yourself. Not over him."

My breathing calmed, and in one slow movement I sat up and Fang's grip softened. I stared at him for a moment, unable to say anything. He ran a hand down my face, wiping a tear away as he went.

"It will be okay, Max," he said quietly, his hand stopping on my cheekbone. "But you have to keep moving forward."

He was right, as usual. Saying it was my fault didn't change the fact that Iggy was dead. It didn't change what the school had done to him.

I needed to help the flock. Even if I had broken one of the only promises I'd ever made to Iggy, I was still here and I had to keep moving.

**Iggy: See, I hated it**

**Me: Yeah, I know it was random, I honestly don't know where it came from**

**Iggy: You like the idea of me dying?**

**Me: -facepalm- That's not it, Iggy**

**Iggy: Then why did you write it?**

**Me: Let's just discuss this later, ok?**

**Iggy: But I want to-**

**Me: No**

**Iggy: But I-**

**Me: No!**

**Iggy: But-**

**Me: NO!**

**Iggy: BUT-**

**Me: IGGY!**

**Iggy: BELL!**

**Me: WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?**

**Iggy: I DON'T KNOW!!!**

**Me: REVIEW PLEASE!!!! I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!!!**

**Iggy: YEAH! WHAT SHE SAID!**

**-Bell and Ig**


End file.
